Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Weaving the Silver Lining

Day 14 of 90 Days to Reach My Goal found me standing in front of the kitchen sink swishing toys around in the dish tub, rinsing them, then submerging them in another tub of warm water with bleach for two minutes before placing them in the dish drain to air dry. My child has too many toys. I've only just santized the first set, so I'll be setting up the soap-water-and-bleach assembly line again before the week is through. The toys will one by one quietly disappear to take their baths until my child will have nothing left to play with except used tissues. By then I hope she'll have no need for tissues, clean or used.
I could allow myself to feel a sense of accomplishment for doing all tasks I had set for myself to achieve my 90-Day Goal. I have been steady inching toward my goal since Day 1. Yet all I can think about is what I haven't been able to accomplish with a sick child at home. I feel so unproductive, especially when she looks so pitiful and sniffly. I want her to get better so she can get on with her own life and enjoy preshcool and playing with her friends. But because it is "just a cold" I get impatient.
Maybe in the end, this lesson is all about learning some patience. As John Lennon once said, "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans." I can be disciplined about doing what it takes to achieve my goal, but I can learn to be satisfied with modest accomplishments on days that I have other priorities. Children get sick--it just happens. I just have to find a way to fold nursing a sick child into everything else with serenity and calm. Even if it means spending a couple of hours sanitizing an embarrassment of toys. I can look at it as an opportunity to sort through and give away some of them. Practicing the fine art of weaving the silver lining.

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